Pain only comes from holding on

Hold on to your dreams, but let them evolve.

I've thought about writing another book, entitled "From domination to discovery"

For much of my life, when I've been unhappy at times (never depressed (I'm too motivated for that) just not feeling satisfied with what I have and what I've done) I've believed - wrongly - very wrongly - that a positive "force of nature" can rework the world.

That is assimilation. The notion that we can bend and incorporate the world - people, events, circumstances - into our rubric. Like when we eat and it becomes part of our body.

That is the dominance part.

The countervailing principle, accommodation, means that we bend ourselves to the world.

From a sense of weakness that is called capitulation.

From a sense of strength it can be called discovery.

Pain comes only from holding on. Life is in eternal flow. You have something inside of you, or beyond, that propels you. I do too. So does everyone in the world.

Some may be more tuned into it than others.

We're not here to dominate others. There is a "will to power" - a well known concept - but competition, whether it exists in the marketplace of products, people or ideas, is meant - when practiced in evolved form - to refine and strengthen.

Like fire can purify (harden into steel) but also burn.

Sunlight can nourish but also be harmful if misapplied.

As I heard a famous person say one time, "let life make you better rather than bitter"

Let the fire strengthen you rather than burn.

Let the sunshine nourish you but don't overbask in its glow.

Let the fear go.

Let the anger go.

Let the disappointment go.

But keep pressing on.

Pain only comes from holding on.

What happens when you move beyond domination?

Discovery.

Discovery is an openness to life, experiences and people.

It is love, because you can only love what you truly respect.

Including yourself.

I've had some hardships in life, and disappointed by my family, who doesn't (often) recognize my path and goals.

But they have their own.

And they have equal greatness. We all do.

Discovery is not capitulation. It is relationship.

I matter. But you matter just as much in regard to value.

We are equals. I'll still be following my life plan, which for each person is primary, but I realize that your life plan is primary for you.

This allows us to avoid being ships that passed in the night. Interacting but never truly connecting.

Connection - real connection - is always a process of discovery.

The world will be transformed as we as individuals are transformed. We always choose leaders who reflect us and our values, so when we have evolved then our leaders will have evolved as well.

In fact, if you want to look at your own level of development, just look at who you associate with.

And who associates with you.

Please be gentle with yourself as you press on. But do press on.

Pain only comes from holding on.